This Means War
starring Reece Witherspoon, Chris Pine, Tom Hardy, Til Schweiger and Chelsea Handler
screenplay by Timothy Dowling and Simon Kinberg
directed by McG
Rating: ♦♦♦♦♦
Called“Black and White” in Japan, This Means War is the kind of movie I like - romantic comedy. I’ve seen Chris Pine in several movies and I like him a lot. So far I have never failed to see him slip comedy into his rolls, even the ones that are not outright comedic, the way that Jeff Goldblum habitually does, and I like that. I think Chris Pine is the next Matt Damon.
FDR Foster (Chris Pine) and Tuck Hanson (Tom Hardy) are best friends. They work together as secret agents traveling all over the world battling international terrorism and crime using all the fancy gadgets that Arnold Schwarzenegger and Tom Arnold used in True Lies (1994). Really cool. They are both single guys, but Foster is the super slick guy looking for girls while his partner is the romantic guy looking for a mate. But as fate has it they both fall in love with the same girl, Lauren (Reece Witherspoon) whom Tuck found on an internet dating site, and the primal contest between two alpha males for the favors of the female is off.
By far the best moments of the film come in the girl talk between Lauren and her best friend, Trish (Chelsea Handler) as Lauren seeks her advice to sort out her guy troubles. It’s unguarded, sex-filled feminine banter. I never thought that women talk like this among themselves in private. I still don’t believe it. Guys’ private talk, on the other hand, is entirely sex-riven. Guys are like dogs. Really.
Some of my favorite lines include, “Pain - that’s just weakness leaving the body.” And, “It’s the mistakes that make us who we are.” But best of all is when Lauren realizes that she is in the middle of two close guys, driving their friendship to ruin: “Oh, my God! I’m Yoko.” The reference, of course, is to Japanese artist Yoko Ono who has been widely criticized as a wedge between the tight Lennon-McCartney musical partnership and a major contributor to the break-up of The Beatles. But many movie goers today are too young to know any of that and so the line is wasted on them. But not on me. I get it. I had to explain it to my daughter.